2014 Goals

I guess it's time to map out my goals for 2014. I told my brother my goals never take root, so I won't be making any, but I think it's time to just go ahead and water the ground anyways, even if nothing takes.

These are in no particular order, simply as they come to mind. And I reserve the right to change/modify these goals.

1) Work hard every single day at something. Develop efficiency in my work.

2) Provide myself more opportunities to showcase my talents, whatever they may be. This will require discovering my talents. Which requires being a) vulnerable and b) spontaneous and c) honest.

3) Develop relationships here. Specifically with guys. Be willing to be present and honest, open and take myself and them seriously (but also be willing to laugh at ourselves)

4) Invest in the community. Including children, sick, elderly, homeless, and people I would not normally consider myself a part of.

5) Try out different aspects of myself. Be willing to morph and become full parts of myself, letting skin be shed completely, knowing it can and will come back when needed/time.

6) Write a story.

7) Take/draw pictures. Pictures as in complete, framed, artistic viewpoints of a point in time, a landscape, people, and my beliefs all wrapped up in a work of art.

8) Read thoroughly, completely, a widely varied selection, that  speaks to me so that the information sticks so snug to my brain and my being that I am hard-pressed to get it out.

9) Sleep soundly, peacefully, and with the intent to rejuvenate my body, mind, and spirit.

10) Travel to a creative hub. Spend time learning about someone. Have it be meaningful enough to last with me for awhile.

11) Learn how to get lost.

12) Learn French, Chinese, Sign Language and Spanish. Be proficient at 2.

13) Learn how to get paid for things I love to do.

14) Learn how to cook meals with red meat, enjoy them, share them, and move on from them.

15) Meet and experience other young artists who will be influential in the world. Enjoy every moment.


Ok, I better cut myself off. I could go on and on about things I want to accomplish. One of them is to continue to READ and WRITE daily. I feel as if that is important in my development.

I pray that all of these goals honor God, give praise to Jesus, and carry me closer to Him. I pray that my gut continues to heal, and I learn even better how to help my brain and body and gut to go about living fully and completely in harmony with the earth around me. I pray I would learn to accept, learn to give, learn to receive, and learn to forgive. In Jesus' holy name, Amen.

My brother Reagan and I went to Sparkroot this morning early. I got a decaf shot of espresso, green tea (2 pots), and then we went to the farmer's market and whole foods. I feel as if I spend more money than anyone ever should, that I am a useless human being, and that I have a long way to go before being able to accept myself and my flaws. I feel dejected and lonely. My stomach feels like it's raging inside me like a washing machine, churning and churning with no suds being produced and nothing getting clean. But I know that isn't true. Not by my own doing but by His, I am being washed clean daily by the power of His earthly elements. Praise Him.

I am tired.