My Tiredness

My tiredness extends beyond the bed, beyond the sun and the full moon that was up this morning at 3:30 with me. He stared at me, brightly illuminating my eyes full of empty sleep-longing. I couldn't reach back into myself and grab the desire to go back to bed. The only desire I had was to continue my morning ritual. I know that just continuing presents problems. I am just doing something for the justness of doing it.

Things I want to get accomplished:

Read Paris in Love. Maybe even get 3/4 of the way through it.
Read some of Le Road Trip
Go to babysit the African children??? Get paid for it??? Decide about this.
Cook something good. Like Gateau aux pommes. I will only need some more apples and some cream. Simple.
Walk with Erin??

Sometimes long term goals rise up in me. Eating and food are the filter through which I am learning the world. They are stronger than words for my brain, for they hold weight and words do not. Food carries words to the deeper parts of my soul. But I am not fed by food as much as I am by words, ideas, images. Think of all that feeds me, in the air and the touch and the seeing and hearing. That comprises more of me than the eating, even if I were eating all day the rest of me is experiencing more.

Goal: Read French books and review them with pictures??? To get money??? I don't know how life works! I'll try Fiver for that.