Posting

I haven't wanted to write a post lately. I get to the end of the day and I just want to read/fall asleep forever. I get so exhausted at the end of the journee.

Today I:

presented Stella Adler
modeled at Inner Tie for a few hours
and that's actually it,
but it felt like a crazy day. I bought an espresso this morning at Exo and I like the atmosphere there, the guy at the counter is my favorite and I want him to look at me kindly for the rest of my life. haha!! I feel stupid and ugly, surprisingly, because I have done so many things that concretely show my "beauty" but I also feel very withdrawn and sad and sinful. I think it's both, but it's the night, I get so tired on myself at night and it gets harder for me to keep the positivity.

I'm really trying to:
learn acting
learn french
learn how to cook and eat more effectively
learn what to do in life that helps me feel both grounded and like I'm flying in hope and love and excitement. I'm trying really hard to help myself balance. I don't know how other people do it with other people in their lives. I guess they're just blessed with that.

I think I will:
Get an acupuncture appointment

Tomorrow:
Clean my car and some books out, even if it's just a little bit. Finish just a little bit if necessary.
Get my hair trimmed
Go to French
Go to Whole Foods and get what I need as far as food for cooking with Denise
Have fun cooking with Denise
Sleep soundly

Friday:
Walk with Caitlyn
Go to meetup with Celeste

I don't understand some people. Or rather I'm unsure as how to respond. I guess with humility and putting all the glory in God is the best way to do it, without wanting to please people but rather pleasing God. He is my one and only. I want to learn that. Hmmm